She Laughs: Backseat Driver

Proverbs 31:25b “She laughs without fear of the future.”

As we continue on the subject of She Laughs, another thought came to mind: a little issue we call control. Specifically, I want to speak to those who have an overwhelming need to fight for the driver’s seat in life…you know who you are! Ha! Reality is we can all struggle with the desire to control both significantly important and frivolously pointless outcomes in our lives.

Unfortunately, I don’t know if ‘she laughs without fear of the future because she is in complete control of it’ is an accurate translation of this Proverb. I believe the message here is that a surrender of control due to trust in God’s faithfulness will result in a future without worry. Allow me to explain.
Proverbs 16:9 “We can make our plans, but the LORD determines our steps.”
In other words, we can plan, force, and manipulate life (or people, or favor) as much as we want, however the Lord is still in control.

Ladies, here we need to proceed with caution. When you look at the description of a noble woman in Proverbs 31 (take some time to read over it), you will see that – though disciplined and strong – she seems to function out of a place of peace and confidence. I personally don’t get the impression that she is functioning out of fear, insecurity, and anxiety.

Controlling situations is a means to create security and comfort for yourself.  When you’re in control, you feel protected from the hurts of life. All sounds really great huh? I’m sorry, but God doesn’t call us to function from this place. He asks us to operate out of vulnerability toward Him which is actually a place of great strength. It’s the strength of a faithful God working in us, through the Holy Spirit, as we trust in Him, believing that he has our best in mind.

I understand it’s hard. This can feel especially difficult when we’ve grown used to controlling situations as means of survival due to past trauma or hardship. However my friend, God is relentless in his pursuit of having ALL of our hearts and He desires us to live an abundant life. Functioning this way, is not part of the freedom that Christ died for.

It’s kind of like being a back seat driver. When you are riding along as a passenger, you tend to attempt taking over. You doubt the driver’s decisions. You question his direction and his method of reaching the destination along with everything else in the journey. How often does this sound like our relationship with God? As He takes us through life, we like to chime in and give our opinions regarding reaching goals, when to stop and rest, and when we deserve to arrive at a destination.

Ask yourself: Where do you find yourself grasping for control?

– In your marriage with your spouse…do you try to control how they will respond or how they think, feel and function?

– How about in your friendships? Do you try to control and manipulate things to work in your best interest?

– What about your finances? Do you hold back with the justification of “making ends meet”?

– Or maybe your destiny? Do you try to create your own opportunities, rather than allowing God to orchestrate them?

Who has control in your life? In which areas of your life are you holding too tight and not releasing to God?

One thing I’ve learned about God: He wants us to find comfort, security, peace and strength in HIM. Other people, material things, or the illusion of control will never provide the same satisfaction! Trying to ‘laugh without fear of the future and control it all at the same time’ is like driving a car with your eyes closed….It doesn’t work!  So friends, be determined from this week on to release the grip (the counterfeit security) and control to God KNOWING that he is faithful and choose to ‘laugh’.


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